When assessing the level of intimacy you share with your ‘friends’, you may find the following categories useful. Notice also that as the level of intimacy decreases, the more lengthy the description of your relationship becomes.
When you lose someone you love, the worst part is having your mind play back almost every argument you’ve had with them even over the smallest things. Those few moments of you at your worst saying words you didn’t really mean just get played over and over again until you start to question how good of a person you actually are. It doesn’t even matter how well you treated them for the most part. It can be enough to make you feel like a monster.